Its friday again! one by one ...they just pass you like that. I remember saying how my exams will pass like a flash..
now i have ONE more paper. JUST one more to go. and that oral exam.and then..asta la vista babei to 2009 .

do you sense that anticipation in my words..i mean see the excitement.

Now, i'm going to wash my dinner up ..plates i mean and head over to IH and play street chess with C. I can be a nerd in different ways. No lecture notes for me tonight. Still got to use my brain though.

till then~

I'm still thinking about that 'plot' . Should I really?? and when should i do it. morning, arvo , night. Its all in the name of fun.
I think i have gone a little nuts.

I like nuts.

For some reason, i feel like some blood in my vessels are about to pop and escape..
I'm a little high.

No i didn't take drugs, except for caffeine, which is not really counted-at all. I think its because, in about a week and 2 days i'll be home. Probably either doing something at home or hanging out at some mamak stall with my close buddies once again.
I also think its because i have TWO more papers. and one more oral exam. Suprisingly i feel pretty calm about the oral exam.Knowing me, i make a fool out of myself each time i get scared..and this involves speaking. I can't help it if i stutter. I just stutter. But somehow, i feel, confident. Thats the word. I shall prove to them i have what it takes to do surgery?
Doubt..is never good.
I had a presentation in class a few weeks ago and again, i embarassed myself. once again. Sometimes i wonder, when the whole class laughs at you, is that actually a good thing?because you manage to put a smile or each's face or really, you should start working on that bimbo-ness of yours.

I do enjoy making one happy. Sometimes even if takes the bimboness out of me. I guess, if thats one thing i can do, right now, why not? Its always good to have that effect on people.
It doesn't matter what people think of me really, i only serve to please those i care for and those that matter. Does this sound selfish?? Kinda, but what i'm trying to say and remind myself is- to always just be yourself.
A close friend of mine told me he would really not like me as a person if he hadn't talked to me, because i gave him an impression of a very stuck up girl. now, ouch. I didn't know i gave that impression. But i guess, sometimes its kinda cool,to have that effect on people. you don't really want people to figure you out totally on the surface or just by having a cup of coffee.Well,i don't.

I only show my true colors , good or bad thats for the other to decide,with time and when i'm comfortable and happy to be around them . Maybe thats why i still get the occasional .. "pfft, you shy??jess? please."

A very naughty thought has just popped up into my head. I feel excited just thinking about it. It may actually do more harm than good . But nonetheless, its worth a try. I shall not mention it yet, just in case i decide to chicken out or something.

But i'm thinking, what would you do if you're in you're room one day and a stranger comes to you're door,knocks on it and tells you .. "i think you are a very interesting person and i really want to get to know you."

As the receiver, i guess standing there with a smile is good enough despite the total shock and akwardness..as the messenger..when would be the right time to pick that foot up and walk away?

guess we'll find out!!

Studying is tiring. and it sure isn't easy when it involves another 5 more papers and an oral exam ..when you already feel bumped out.
Is it just me??? I feel much better when i pop into facebook and see distressing statuses that some people are in..
and we all have one thing in common . we are all doing vet.

oh how lovely.

I'm thinkin, man i should really be use to this by now. When am i ever going to get use to this..body react quick please.

Alright, all for the sake of the animals. Don't get me wrong, despite how frustrated, annoyed, tired, or moody i get, i only whine and complain to feel better. I think i'm still at that age where i deserve to throw a little tantrum. Only difference is, i have nothing to throw this time. I love my notes and all the printed lecture notes. I am going to keep them for a long long time. I guess staple bullets would do the trick for now.
Tonight, after another 8 hours of sleep ..(thats what i aim for always if not 9 ) since its kind of a holiday ...I really want to wake up re-charged tomorrow.
So i took a break last night and tonight..i'm still tired.

I really like the quote ' knowledge is power '.

YAWNS* goodnight people. sweet dreams.

The surroundings are full of heat...its so hot, in times like these, my house is the bomb. Because it naturally feels like its air conditioned 24-7.. Which is why people love my house when its hot but hate it when its winter.

I chose to step out today, into the hot sun, blazing!! Each time i see someone in black ...i can't stop but go..'what the?! that person must be cooking...
Then i see someone with long sleeves, jacket and pants..and i can't help but think...whyyyyy....

Then there are those who step out with nothing, like boys who can walk around without t-shirts..i wish girls had the freedom to do so..and when that happens...will it ever happen?? would i dare to?? actually no. haha

At least 7 eleven is open on a saturday morning, i mean noon . Thank god for ice drinks..cold drinks. I am currently in the computer lab in Uni blogging. There are less than 10 people with me. All gazing with full concentration..or perhaps maybe their faking it like i do sometimes.. :)

Its funny how some people handle stress well,they worry about nothing, and everything is beautiful . (maybe i'm wrong..but the fact that they keep their cool ..its pretty amazing)  i for one, think i do handle stress well..SOMETIMES. I guess , i've come to a point that when studies get tiring or i'm sick of studying..all i do is constantly remind myself ' don't think and just do it' ..it helps actually. Because what changes do you get when you think too much or if you get all whiny and upset over something that you have already put yourself in..for life! oh goodness.

I'm happy :)

I just want to get this over with.

I miss climbing trees, flying kites, playing hide and seek, running through the forests, lying in dirt, looking for creatures to molest/torture, burrowing crab holes ..and the list goes on.
I miss childhood days. I like guitar hero, wii and computer games, but nothing beats being outside in nature and having fun. Let me rephrase, maybe sometimes i would love to be indoors having good company and doing something fun .But technology vs nature , 0-5.

Clubbing, and night outings vs twister, pillow fights, potlucks, pictionary ,movies and snacks on sofa or bed with company ..0-5

.

To hang or not to hang..truly depicts what i feel for 8 papers . just kiddinnnnng . =)
If i can do 10..before this. whats 8 ?  ...10 -2 .

i'm thinking.

Suddenly a very important revelation hit me...that is ..a question that i was meant to ask myself way long ago..back in 2007..ahem..

Are you ready and serious to go out there and face clients, answer questions, meet challenges and save lives?? 

NO.omg!

Thats why, a revelation just hit me, i'm already halfway through to my course, and i realize..vet is so not just about treating animals. Now whoever reads this ,must go..huh? what is she going to come up with now? 
well, i just realize, i can't remember what i've learnt in the past..which apparently is normal..but the point is, its about time, i start to take every single thing seriously, and ...whats the other word for grow up..mature , yes.

I don't know if its the hormones or because i'm turning 22 in about 6 days..i mean 6 days. But really, i really  don't want to go into practice having someone sue me for killing their animal or making their animal even worse than it already is..OR having to say 'i donno' to myself.. that is going to suck. In fact, screwing up is the last thing i want to do. Although, i'm ready to make mistakes, afterall, thats the only way to learn. I just hope they ain't too big a mistake. lol. And i really don't like the idea of me throwing 3 years of work away..when its actually suppose to be glued to me for life. not good. at. all.

In the middle of swot vac now, and i am currently taking a break. Its that pain again at the corners of my head that tells me, 'jess rest' .okay, rest i will. 20 more days to go..its only 20 days, whats the big deal right? well, 20 days could do a lot of damage. Don't i sound sad? heh.
I was right, 1st week is always cool..and 2nd week is when i start to foresee a lot of yuck .aka..i don't want to study anymore. Today is the 7th day. ....yuck...yuck it is.

I got a place at kendall. and i really like what i got. I kind of cant wait to move in there. Its going to be my first time staying at a 'hostel' ..but being able to meet more people and make new friends,and hopefully extend my anti social skills..why not.  I just really want to make it to next year. Which means getting through this stage of exams. I do not want to come back in the middle of my summer holiday to resit papers/paper. I will be immensely upset and angry. It won't happen.

I can't wait to go back ..its counting down...its kinda cool how the exams make you want to go home faster, and makes KLIA so much more special..there's nothing wrong with melbourne. I just miss life back in KL...hanging out with my msian buddies are always so different compared to here, of course i still love hanging out with people here, but, theres that feeling that always resembles 'home' ..then theres my mom's voice again...omg. i love my mum, but her voice..can drive me insane..actually it drives everyone insane. Its good that you haven't heard it, you don't want to. Thank goodness, giving birth to me is worth more than that...then disney, his fur, his smell, his licks and annoying bark..which too drives everyone crazy..then my dad though i seldom talk to him and see him, its always good to go home and be able to say 'hi dad!', he is afterall still my dad, and yes i love him too. Then , my sisters and brother..i am going to be an auntie!! i just can't wait to see soph fat..(sorry soph, you still look beautiful) ..pregnant people are beautiful! eventhough their fat ! my brother, will probably be taller than me now, sheet. I really don't like that at all. Bec, i believe she is still the same,nonetheless, thats just why she's bec, and there are always moments that i look forward to with her.
Hurm..who else..ah yes my grandma!! 1st thing that comes to my mind, LAKSA. shame on me..i haven't talked to her in the whole year..i expect some kind of lecture when i return..but will be nothing..i miss her.

Why do we complain seriously .Just do it and go to sleep. What am i talking about?? what else.
rest, times up.

I think i might just head to bed early today, get up for a jog tomorrow. Lifestyle has got to change once in awhile.
Till then~

Reading the lyrics..i find it makes no sense..or either that, i just always don't get things.. most of the time.

Currently addicted to this song, because i listen to it while waiting for the tram, when i grocery shop, even when i visit the public toilets..
Until i realize i was mouthing the words, and turned around and saw this lady staring.

Geez.

~Knock you down- keri hilson, neyo and kanye west.~

What was the definition of focus again? geeez!